He has been gone for three years now. But the memory lingers. I was one among many who spoke after the Mass
celebrated prior to his interment.
Because of the frenzy and exigencies of the moments, I
doubt anybody if any remembers what I said then. I actually printed out what I read for my
part.
Found the note, and will now write it out in a blog
entry as permanent testimonial to a life lived in close proximity to mine.
0000000000000000
“Any man’s
death diminishes me, because I am involved in mankind, and therefore never send
to know for whom the bells toll; it tolls for thee”
This is a
quote from poet, John Donne.
Words we have
often heard said. Nice-sounding and
inspiring words. But what exactly do they mean to each one of us?
Graciano
Nonong Neri, Jr. died a week ago and we are here gathered to help send him off
to a life hereafter.
In the
following narration, I try my best to put personal touches to those inspiring
words above. To show how Nonong’s
passing diminishes me because he was involved in my life.
More than
just being first cousins, both our families were unusually close to each other,
due to certain special circumstances.
This very intimate closeness made for many shared experiences, of joys
and jubilation, of mirth and merriment, of sorrows and hardships.
Both families
tended to do things together. The
children practically growing up together, planning and doing things together. Going to picnics together, taking trips
together, going on vacations or out of town trips together. More like two families fused as one. Since Nonong’s family was more blessed
materially, one could say that in many of those joint activities we were more
the beneficiaries rather than the benefactors.
Taking Nonong
out of the equation then means simply and outrightly taking away those revered
memories from me and making them vanish in mist, since Nonong was an integral
part to all of them.
So from the
time that I became self-aware as a person, living in the retiring hometown of
Cagayan de Oro, it has been difficult for me to imagine events and occasions
during my growing-up years without Nonong and his family somehow figuring in
them.
During hot
summer afternoons, we went riding with horses in and around the Provincial
Capitol grounds. On other occasions, we
planned extended trips to Taguanao, again taking horses with us, aside from
ample provisions for overnight stays.
During family
gatherings, parties, and restaurant sorties, Nonong and his trusty jeep figured
in helping family members to and from the different venues they were being
held.
During
college years in the same school, there were instances when our associations
were more than just being cousins. One
time we tried our hands in campus politics, and vied for elective positions
together. And yes, Nonong was with me
when I first paid a visit to a local girl we had spotted earlier. So riding tandem in my motorbike we went
together to face the girl’s family who was residing in the poblacion.
And there
were even hazardous and dangerous errands we both had to undertake, like taking
a boat and flying on an old and rickety plane, hopping from one Visayas island
to another, bringing with us cash resources to an aunt who had a critical need
for them.
And there
were countless other occasions when we partnered together, again sharing
memories that cannot be rent asunder without somehow making them disappear from
me.
Thus, I say
his sudden passing certainly diminishes my life.
And I can
only bid him Godspeed till we meet again.
Till then, Nong.
