How one timely and prudent move of my late mother may have helped shape my future. And more than giving it form and shape, may have saved it.
One clear manifestation of a mother's trove of virtues she critically needs in creating and growing her own family, to match the task's multitude of responsibilities.
For many adults the events of youth may be subjects of either happy reminiscences or rueful regrets, but in most instances we consign them to a remote segment of our minds after we attain maturity. We are too preoccupied with adult life, we do not want to be bothered much by such puerile gestures like trying to make sense of events in our reckless youth.
But at certain advanced stages, we cannot help but be prodded to recall early events to try and understand why certain things in our adulthood transpired as they did. Or were allowed to happen, or that one was lucky enough to be offered them.
Given such a listless and a bit chaotic childhood for me, I welcome this rehashing of my youth if only to understand my life better. And better still, such revelation may assist my next generation in their own living of life.
So for these reasons, this little exercise in history is being undertaken.
In my own life in high school, one stark detail that sticks out is the growing aimlessness and listlessness I was experiencing not only at home but more pronouncedly, in school.
I was immersed practically in my own little world, though surrounded by many people composed not only of many siblings but companies I kept away from home. Found himself drifting to a less real and more fanciful world. A world of carefree living, with reduced responsibilities and complete freedom to roam and idle. And of course, with no serious thought of the future.
And this I was experiencing as I was approaching the end of high school. Though I may not have been aware of it, or maybe was not capable to comprehend situations that I had no prior knowledge, I now think that maybe some people around where I lived may have noticed it. From telltale signs that taken together could spell disaster. Like little missteps in school that could be signs of graver issues. Or the school administrators may have gone above me and reported it to my mother who was the guardian at home.
In hindsight I now judge that had there been no intervention my downward slide could have gotten worse, who knows to what nadir. To a point of no return?
Anyway, after a year of college in the same school I did high school, I was suddenly whisked off to Manila to live with my father and a couple of elder brothers who were not only living there but also studying. And the trip somehow jibed with another issue that needed immediate attention in Manila. Our youngest sister needed medical attention for a skin problem on her neck that she was born with. So what better opportunity for me to accompany her on a long and slow boat trip to Manila. As I understand it, it was my mother who had insisted that I be sent to study in Manila.
That change in scenery and environment I now believe was the turning point of my young life. The 3 years spent there had given me valuable insights and accommodating knowledge that allowed me to change my outlook and attain the maturity that would later on me serve me creditably in life. Because after 3 years and graduation from an undergraduate degree, I would be sent back to the old hometown and to start a new life. Or really to pick up from where I left off. The changes were mostly inside, with few visible changes in the outside. Save for such petty stuff as beaming that I could afford to dress with the latest trends brought from Manila, which would be quite an improvement from the local fashion.
And from henceforward my life had completely taken a different turn. This time a serious and expectant one. I had become quite serious with my further studies and was actually thinking about my future and its prospects.
So one wonders what would have happened had my mother not taken the action that she did. God only knows. But it would not be farfetched to surmise that that was the rightful decision during that time. And it was not because Manila offered a better place to live or continue school. Just that the change itself was the trigger that sparked the transformation to maturity.
In life sometimes earlier blessings we received are not known and acknowledged until we are almost through with life. But we get to it before it is too late.
