The Legacies We Think About

 

No doubt as we approach the back-nine segment of our short temporal lives, we start poring over the likely things that are past beyond our sojourn here.   When our bodies start the descent toward the sunset of its existence, we start worrying about what worthy mementoes to leave behind for our progeny, things which will endure beyond the years after our lives.  We weigh and sift through about some things fleeting, and about those that endure.  Fleeting because we live life in the flesh, but lasting because we believe in a soul and an afterlife.  Man being an inextricably composite being.

 We are talking therefore about legacies to be bequeathed.  Public officials and corporate bigwigs all the way to presidents and heads of state constantly talk about them, prepare for them, or gear their consequential actuations with them in mind.  So why not the ordinary mortal man?

 So what should we think about during our greying years?

 Many of us would focus on non-material things, rather than the temporal wealth which many view as not only petty and mundane but by their earthbound nature as beneath bequeathing to beloved children or grandchildren weaned on noble and mystical dreams.  We constantly are reminded that we should not leave much material wealth since they are prone to spoiling the receiver, dissipate their passion and intensity for living, deprive them of the purifying challenges necessary to make their lives more purposeful, etc. But again we  remind that man lives life in the flesh with all its wants and needs, and the easier that process is the better for him to think about his nobler goals and purposes. Expressed differently, man is more able to contemplate at the stars if he is not constantly looking on the ground for his food and sustenance.

 So with that in mind, we proceed to the task at hand.  What should our legacies be to the generation/s that come after us?

 For something more enduring and noble, we earnestly wish that the things we taught them, the examples that we lovingly provided, would all carry over to them like genes or DNA encoded in their very bodies and souls.  For we believe that would truly be timeless legacy.  And we add the caveat that defines our honesty, that everything we pass on to them we not only believe in but that we earnestly pursued them in our own lives.

 But for more temporal legacies we can list a few.

 Provision of shelter, adequate and decent, is one driving concern of modern families which lifelong pursuit eats up a good part of their time and resources.  A crucial and necessary accoutrement for living productive and decent lives, lives with integrity worthy of his kind.  And many lives have been less than commendable because of the dearth of good shelter, coupled and in tandem with the scarcity of financial provisions for the family.

 A good many of us spend our productive lives in employment.  From the start of our education we already have conditioned ourselves how we can become good, loyal, and faithful employees.  Of course we do not discount the fact that we would prefer being employed doing things that suit our likes and disposition.  Still many are employed concerned more about what that employment brings to the family and its existence rather than how well liked or adjusted one is to the employment.

 Wouldn’t it be a great legacy therefore to leave behind some business or enterprise that our progeny can continue after?  Many current entrepreneurs started much like that, inheriting the business from their well-provisioned ancestors.  And then on their own made the business even bigger and greater than before.  Look around and you will see how true this is in real life.

 Molding leaders rather than followers would indeed be a great legacy to leave.  Being in business and striking on your own is one surefire way to test not only one’s acumen and wits, but also bring out and hone leadership qualities dreamed only by many.

 Personally, imagine this as coming from one veteran of various employment.  If after years of employment, one engages in economic activities on his own one then experiences a role quite alien, from the learned perspective of an employee to that of employer.  In other words, after looking at things from one perspective, one suddenly opens a vista where one looks at things from the other side.

 A chance to look at things differently, and more importantly, to complete and round off the economic picture so commonplace in our lives today. 

 Get a chance to see how the other lives, the other side that has so few select members, and so uniquely privileged in many areas such as opportunities and access to the many beneficial things in life brought by progress and wealth.  And thus a chance to live a more fulfilled life.

 For most of us, Mother Teresa was the epitome and icon of personal sanctity, given what she exhibited in her solitary life in the mean streets of India and thereabouts.  But I also find Bill Gates as another likely example in a similar vein and on a grander scale.  A philanthropist on steroids who can declare with effective intention to an entire impoverished nation in Africa that he will undertake to educate all of its little children so that they can realistically hope for   a better life for themselves and their families.  An entire nation given the opportunity to live better lives.  And now in terms of impact and efficacy that is really something!

Wondering if Nonchalance has become a Virtue

 

 

Having lived in a foreign developed country for over a quarter of a century, one had tailored for oneself a suit of expectations meant to make life more smooth, less stressful, and contentment-defined.  A place to hitch one’s temporal future to. A defined environment where one would get clean and climate-controlled environment, both in private and in public.  Where people behavior in public places and roadways could easily be predicted as to make reaction and interaction reflexive and expected.  Or in fine, where things look or work well enough as to be satisfactory and demandable. 

 It was thus that in that milieu while one could definitely become nonchalant about the things beyond one’s own personal life, that would be considered  generally unacceptable.  Because in that milieu such attitude is frowned upon.  One cannot be unconcerned and passive.  The minute any thing goes awry the citizenry is expected or conditioned to howl in protest and demand redress at the soonest possible time.  Things being or done right was expected and demandable, with deviance from that standard not to be tolerated or be nonchalant about.  Overall, this made for a nice living for most concerned.  At certain places, things like the climate and the geography were factored in with desired sets of expectations.

Now fast forward to life back to the old homeland, in other words, life in a third-world country, where even the typical climate may be said to conspire to bring about its benighted state.  And immediately adjustments have to be made in expectations if one desires to retain one’s composure or sanity.  Occasioned by wholesale penury and squalor not only in the countryside but in all the nooks and corners of city life.   Where people behavior in public places and roadways have so deviated from what could be considered acceptable behavior, as to tread into the purview of illegality.

Being thrust into such a now challenging environment one’s hard-earned idealism had easily waned, or more appropriately, had been rudely blunted by continued exposure or immersion to the harsh realities.  One then starts thinking about nonchalance in a different light, as apt defense mechanism befitting the challenges of the times.  This time as a virtue?

Others may rather prefer the use of the word cynicism which we know is more judgmental.  But I say nonchalance is more apt, more middle of the road, or better, as safe fence-straddling.

Illustrations may shed light on this exposition.

We now live in a gated private subdivision with a perimeter fence, which is quite makeshift in certain areas.  And every day, we labor thru a commute of about 2 kilometers from the residence to our place in the poblacion.  Because of chaotic traffic conditions, our daily route has become circuitous and long-winded resulting in a doubling in distance.  This is done to avoid traffic chokepoints as much as is possible. From this, one may be led to believe that we are living hunky-dory lives, albeit spotted with a few petty inconveniences.  From that score, one could not agree more.

However, a more involved exposition would show dark underbellies that reasonably concerned people should not be able to ignore or be passive about.  At first, at least.

Thus to escape the madding crowd entry thru our gate brings us to more calming place where one could put one’s hair down and be at peace.   This however is only illusory since in my case looking beyond my back fence one becomes witness to penury and squalor elicited by squatter families living in decrepit shanties, slapped together with any material that can provide shelter and privacy.  With no indoor plumbing, no electricity, too many children per family.  Not even any defined access and egress to their land-locked place.  Clambering over the fences being one scarce option.

And that daily sortie into the rest of the city provides more evidence of the things wrong in the place.  In some places streets have been constricted by makeshift dwellings of squatters living practically on the streets.  Where street drainage systems are either non-existent or if present appear to work only during dry season, since runoff water coming from rain or the dwellings are ever present on the curbs and streets.  Sidewalks too in some places have become non-existent preempted by people living in very congested quarters.

Such a dire outlook, but I feel they all need to be said.  Since one now feels a pervasive and ever-growing sense of nonchalance on the part of the ever-lessening numbers of those others blessed and free from the clutches of penury and squalor.

Pretty soon these and worse will become the new normal in this society.  If they are not already.

 

WHAT MORE CAN LIFE OFFER

 

WHAT MORE CAN LIFE OFFER

When one is young all the expected bounties and wonders of life are gloriously arrayed in front, eagerly awaiting their choosing.  And the dizzying numbers of life’s offerings accord us little respite for introspection.  We are wont to grab at the closest enticing “fruits” our eyes can feast on and our arms can wrap around.

And most of us plod through life being bombarded with these enticements so that somehow time unwittingly passes without much thought and reflection.   We just let life, or more aptly allow life, to pass through us in the order and likely priority things are presented to us.

Most times whether for good or bad little is done in the way of long-term assessment.  As long as we are enjoying ourselves or if not as long as they are within tolerable levels of our good judgments whether morally or socially.  Sometimes we are stopped dead on our tracks by well-meaning people who may find our hedonistic ways deviating from some acceptable societal strictures.  Or prodded by some unexplainable urge, we stop ourselves from proceeding, giving us pause to allow for a refocus and refresh.

All these will occur in our lives to bring us to our wizened stages, and beyond.  And we may ask ourselves the question:  What more can life offer? 

If we have weaned ourselves of the unnecessary trappings of this temporal existence that question will keep popping up.  Lest we proceed with our waning years, rudderless and without meaningful purposes of life.

I consider this time then the crossroad where this question is most apropos.  After all we are at an age that approximates the average lifespan of the species.

Answering that question is no easy task coming immediately after a life of perplexing challenges – delving on a host of hard questioning about elemental issues of human existence.

If life had been a more deliberate and regimented cadence of focused and purposeful daily living, it might have been easy to confront and resolve the many ramifications of such an issue.

But rarely does such thing happen.  Rather it will literally be a hodge-podge of a life littered with countless trials and errors each aimed at arriving at some pre-determined goals and purposes.  Since success or contentment has been such an elusive quarry, such a succession of unexpected results has been the norm.  So that finding therefore what else life has to offer poses such a daunting challenge.

But many sessions of solitary introspection have revealed enough to write about what life could still have to offer at this late stage in life.  The fact of having been exposed to the earthly works of Christ and his ardent followers has given us sufficient material to plot out a defensible plan for the remainder of our lives.

However, if one continues to be firmly bound and attracted to this temporal life, we cannot resolve this issue so that one can scheme a plan for a happy ending, one true to one’s purposes of living.

This earthly life no doubt holds a lot of allurement and strong ties to bind most humans to its temporal love.  Given the unique duality of our very nature, that of body and soul, man is quite predisposed  to favor the more temporal and tangible values of the world -  the pleasures of food, travel, sex, good looks and skills, fame and fortune, all the allures easily grasped by our senses.

The things appertaining to the soul, though unarguably more lasting and noble are much harder to grasp, much less pursue.  Thus man has to take that extra gargantuan effort to leap from temporal to the mystical or spiritual.  Getting to this stage is optional, and does not come as default.  This makes it even more daunting for us humans.  Unless some catastrophe or life-changing events shake us from our stupor, we tend not to mind much.  We let it pass.

Floated out there is the belief that getting old is a privilege.  And its meaning has been difficult to fathom.  In one vein it would indeed be a privilege if one expects or is expected to die young.  Or if a life-threatening event happens in one’s life like an accident or a catastrophic illness.  Or maybe when one is fated not to reach old age.  Or in our total embrace of our Supreme Being, it is a privilege because every second of our life is dependent upon His goodness and providence.

But all things considered old age is a physical inevitability, regardless how one lives life.  Unlike mental growth which must be consciously and purposely pursued, old age is the default eventuality for most surviving individuals.

We know then the answer to the question:  What more can I do?  Rather than: What more can life offer?

When a tree falls in the forest and there’s no one there, does it create a sound?

 

 

An age-old question that regularly comes to the fore during moments of challenges and anxiety.

Typically when confronted by such a query, one’s analytical mind cranks up a stock answer, culled from some physical laws of nature.

Thus it goes like this, such an event creates silent sound waves that travel through the air, and unless they bump into a hearing organ, any hearing organ, no discernible sound ensues.

Well, you know the inferred ramifications.  Simply, that since such events escape notice they can be summarily disregarded and assigned to the dustbin of forgetfulness.

But what if the question has been intended to go beyond the physical, and to delve into the metaphysical, or mystical?

Then there needs a revisiting of the question. 

A believer of a Supreme Being can deduce that this entity being everywhere and anywhere in time and beyond, then yes, He hears and knows everything, and requires an accounting of all those from his subjects.  Should those actions carry negative repercussions or connotations, then yes, the actor ought to pay attention and account for them

Applying to real life.  Indeed there are actions or thoughts done that though limited to one’s mind, or maybe simply an covert issue between two private persons,  one may dismiss such as inconsequential and worthy of forgetting, especially if those actions or thoughts date back to already hazy prior times.  Ostensibly events that create no sound.

But what if these remain stubborn and take up residence in one’s wakefulness for all this time?  Might not that be a telltale sign that they have to be addressed head on and resolution to be sought?  That somehow that is the Supreme Being’s way of insinuating or inferring that yes, those have to be addressed and resolved?

Anyway, one may counter that that is simply an issue that depends on each individual person.  Giving cognizance to the cliché, different strokes for different folks.

Be that as it may, it is my personal resolve that I better start toward this not so beaten path and start accounting for those recalcitrant issues that continue to befuddle and confuse.  And being possessed of abundant shortcomings and thorny faults, this may require a hefty part of whatever life there may be remaining.  In this regard, much patience and understanding is asked of those concerned.  Coming from a very fragile being born into concupiscence.

So begin again, it will be. With a call to the gods that good fortune is sent my way.

 

 

 

(Graphic from: http://www.eloquentscience.com)

 

 

Piecing Together The Past With Old Documents

 

 

For those of us born during the last world war, and even for those before that, there is one common challenge we face in establishing our identities for a variety of purposes, among those purposes are enrolling in school, getting employment, or more specifically securing a passport.

Our birth records are nowhere to be found as sworn by the local registrar, under the blanket reason that all such records were lost during that war.  To establish our birth dates we have had to have notarized affidavits executed by either close family relatives or acquaintances who were all witnesses to our births.   Only then can our birth dates be recognized by legal authorities.

However, there is one other quite reliable source which has first-hand record of our births, though not sufficient for most legal purposes.  That would be the local parish of the Catholic Church where most of us are members.

Thus though unable to secure my birth certificate from the local civil registrar, it was quite easy to go to the San Agustin Cathedral and secure an official copy of my Baptismal Certificate.  Information contained therein revealed a few interesting facts that caught my attention the first time I viewed it almost 40 years ago.

Beyond the few facts typewritten on the standard form, one with a fertile imagination can weave some revealing tales from them, in conjunction with other facts already known from other sources.

Thus, here is an attempt to weave a tale on the circumstances of my birth, to provide more flesh to the sketchy narratives I have kept over the years.

I was born in the sitio of Taguanao, which is now part of Indahag, sometime in the early morn of December 28, 1941.  This was the same month and year when Pearl Harbor was bombed and thus started the hostilities between the US and Japan.  Being a part of the US then, the entire Philippines was also drawn into the cauldron of another global war.  Local residents then were deeply focused on their plans to try and escape the invading hordes of Japanese.  This was “evacuation” time, when many urban dwellers took to the hills to avoid notice and contact with the hostile forces.  And it was essentially to each his own.

As far as I can gather, the entire sitio of Taguanao was in most likelihood owned by the family of my grandfather, and thus it would not be surprising to know that family members of the old patriarch were gathered and huddled together in that then faraway place.  This getaway  was securely covered with dense growth, located in rugged terrain, and isolated by the absence of roads.

But which children with their growing families evacuated to Taguanao?  My grandfather had 7 children, with the eldest being Carmen Neri Marfori.  And my father was the 5^th in the family.  My aunt Carmen had 11 children and my father had 9 with me as the 5^th in line.

My birth certificate listed my Aunt Carmen’s eldest child and her husband as my 2 godparents.  They were Carolina M. Pascual and Mike Pascual.  It stated further that the baptismal rite was performed January 27, 1942, a month after my recorded birth.

What can be possibly surmised from the above data?  That at the very least Tia Mameng and some of her children were with her in Taguanao.  And one of them would be Nang Carolina and her husband, Jovencio.  Later I would learn that aside from my grandfather, the family of Tia Mameng also owned a huge piece of property in Taguanao not far from the former.

Why did they become my godparents and why just them?  Again we surmise given the facts then that because the trip from Taguanao to the poblacion was quite an arduous one possible only on foot or horseback and to escape as much notice as possible from townspeople and other prying eyes, only a handful of people went down for the trip, with infant in tow.  I surmise the young couple would have been ideal for the trip, being physically able to overcome challenges along the way.

The record of my birth was signed by Fr. Vincent I. Kennally SJ, who most probably was also the parish priest who conducted the baptismal rite.

The following years were crazy war years, now cloaked mostly in forgetfulness.  And it would not be till the waning months of 1945 when peace would come visit the place again.