Wednesday, July 29, 2020

In Memoriam: Graciano (Nonong) B. Neri




 He has been gone for three years now.  But the memory lingers.  I was one among many who spoke after the Mass celebrated prior to his interment.

Because of the frenzy and exigencies of the moments, I doubt anybody if any remembers what I said then.  I actually printed out what I read for my part.

Found the note, and will now write it out in a blog entry as permanent testimonial to a life lived in close proximity to mine.


0000000000000000


“Any man’s death diminishes me, because I am involved in mankind, and therefore never send to know for whom the bells toll; it tolls for thee”
This is a quote from poet, John Donne.

Words we have often heard said.  Nice-sounding and inspiring words. But what exactly do they mean to each one of us?

Graciano Nonong Neri, Jr. died a week ago and we are here gathered to help send him off to a life hereafter.

In the following narration, I try my best to put personal touches to those inspiring words above.  To show how Nonong’s passing diminishes me because he was involved in my life.

More than just being first cousins, both our families were unusually close to each other, due to certain special circumstances.  This very intimate closeness made for many shared experiences, of joys and jubilation, of mirth and merriment, of sorrows and hardships.

Both families tended to do things together.  The children practically growing up together, planning and doing things together.  Going to picnics together, taking trips together, going on vacations or out of town trips together.  More like two families fused as one.  Since Nonong’s family was more blessed materially, one could say that in many of those joint activities we were more the beneficiaries rather than the benefactors.

Taking Nonong out of the equation then means simply and outrightly taking away those revered memories from me and making them vanish in mist, since Nonong was an integral part to all of them.

So from the time that I became self-aware as a person, living in the retiring hometown of Cagayan de Oro, it has been difficult for me to imagine events and occasions during my growing-up years without Nonong and his family somehow figuring in them.

During hot summer afternoons, we went riding with horses in and around the Provincial Capitol grounds.  On other occasions, we planned extended trips to Taguanao, again taking horses with us, aside from ample provisions for overnight stays.

During family gatherings, parties, and restaurant sorties, Nonong and his trusty jeep figured in helping family members to and from the different venues they were being held.

During college years in the same school, there were instances when our associations were more than just being cousins.  One time we tried our hands in campus politics, and vied for elective positions together.  And yes, Nonong was with me when I first paid a visit to a local girl we had spotted earlier.  So riding tandem in my motorbike we went together to face the girl’s family who was residing in the poblacion.

And there were even hazardous and dangerous errands we both had to undertake, like taking a boat and flying on an old and rickety plane, hopping from one Visayas island to another, bringing with us cash resources to an aunt who had a critical need for them.

And there were countless other occasions when we partnered together, again sharing memories that cannot be rent asunder without somehow making them disappear from me.

Thus, I say his sudden passing certainly diminishes my life.

And I can only bid him Godspeed till we meet again.  Till then, Nong.